How To Choose Your First Sex Toy

Sex toys are an important part of any sexual relationship. They can be used in foreplay, during intercourse, and even as a way to masturbate.

However, choosing the right sex toy is not always easy. You want something that will help you get off, but also something that won’t break your bank account.

The good news is that there are many different types of sex toys available today. Here are some tips on how to choose one.

Sex Toys for Beginners

There are several different types of sex toys out there. Some of them are designed specifically for women while others are made for men.

There are vibrators, dildos, anal plugs, cock rings, nipple clamps, butt plugs, and more. It all depends on what you like and what works best for you.

If you have never tried using a sex toy before, it may take some time to figure out which ones work best for you. So start small by trying just one or two items at first.

Types of Sex Toys for Women

There is a huge variety of sex toys available. For the purpose of this article, we’ll focus on pleasure objects dedicated to women. 

There are several types of sex toys for women, each with its own advantages and disadvantages. Some of these include clitoral stimulators, anal beads, vaginal rings, and more. Each type offers unique benefits and drawbacks, so it pays to shop around before buying.

Here are the most common types of love toys for beginners. 

Clitoral Stimulators

Clitoral stimulators are typically small. Most of them have discreet shapes that won’t attract unwanted attention, even if you leave them in plain sight on your nightstand. Some examples would be the Satisfyer Penguin, or the Satisfyer Pro 2

Satisfyer Penguin Review – Satisfyer Pro Penguin Next-Generation

Satisfyer Penguin Review – Satisfyer Pro Penguin Next-Generation

Dressed to the nines in a classy tux, the Penguin combines Satisfyer’s revolutionary Air-Pulse Technology with a …
Add to wishlistAdded to wishlistRemoved from wishlist 2
Add to compare

Clitoral stimulators come in various shapes. Lay-on vibrators typically have a pebble-like shape and are meant to be used hands-free. Bullet vibrators have a pointed end for precise stimulation of your clit.

The best thing is that you can use your clitoral stimulator on all external erogenous zones of your body or a partner’s: the nipples, the scrotum, the perineum, and so on. 

Pressure Wave Clitoral Stimulators

Pressure wave clitoral stimulators rock! They create a strong suction sensation that is similar to a real cunnilingus, but way more intense. 

These suction toys stimulate the clitoris without direct contact. You just put the clitoris inside a small “mouth” and it will start sucking to give you pleasure. But why the absence of direct contact is so important?

For some women, prolonged use of toys that come into contact with your clitoris causes numbing or assuefaction. Simply put, after a certain time, these women stop feeling pleasure (or start feeling less pleasure) while using their toy. With suction toys, this won’t happen. 

Rabbit Vibrators

The rabbit is a vibrator that has been around for quite some time. It became famous thanks to an infamous appearance in Sex and the City.

Rabbit-style vibrators feature two endings: a main shaft, meant for vaginal penetration, and an external clitoral stimulator. In classic models, the external clit stimulator has the shape of a rabbit. Rabbit ears are great for clitoral stimulation

However, you’ll find a huge variety of shapes on the market: butterflies, flowers, geometric shapes…

The main shaft is typically curved for optimal G-spot stimulation. The rabbit vibrator is so popular because it can stimulate simultaneously the most sensitive spots of a woman’s body, delivering super intense orgasms.

Vibrating Eggs

Vibrating eggs, such as the Lovense Lush 3 feature a remote control. You wear the egg inside your vagina as if it was a tampon, then go out and about. You can wear it while doing grocery shopping, going for a walk with your dog, enjoying a cocktail with friends — anything applies!

Lovense Lush 3 Review – What Makes the Lush 3 So Popular?

Lovense Lush 3 Review – What Makes the Lush 3 So Popular?

At the beginning of 2021, Lovense were proud to offer you Lush 3! The charging port was updated to a magnetic one for …
Add to wishlistAdded to wishlistRemoved from wishlist 4
Add to compare

And here comes the best part: you hand the remote control to your partner. This simple, inexpensive toy lets you explore exhibitionist fantasies without anyone knowing!

Don’t worry, modern love eggs have silent motors, so nobody will discover your dirty little secret. The most sophisticated models can be controlled from your smartphone. 

G-Spot Vibrators

G-spot vibrators feature a curved shape that stimulates the anterior wall of your vagina, where the G-spot is. This makes it effortless to find the G-spot and discover a whole new dimension of pleasure. 

Some G-spot vibrators have a rippled texture to stimulate the vaginal walls as well. Look for models with two or more vibrating motors, they will make your masturbation sessions even more intense! 

Anal Plugs

Anal plugs such as the Lovense Hush 2 feature a special teardrop shape for easy insertion. The wider base lets them stay in place inside the anus — they won’t fall while you stand up and walk. The larger end of the plug stays outside the anus at all times.

Lovense Hush 2 Review

Lovense Hush 2 Review

My Lovense Hush 2 Review – Is the Lovense Hush 2 Good? What Do I Think About the Sex Toy? Lovense Hush 2 Review …
Add to wishlistAdded to wishlistRemoved from wishlist 0
Add to compare

This allows you to remove the plug easily by simply pulling the end that is positioned outside the body. Also, this shape makes it virtually impossible for the plug to get stuck inside the anal canal. 

Butt plugs are not only fun, but they can definitely help if you’re experiencing problems with anal sex. If this is the case for you, try keeping the plug inserted for 20 – 30 minutes before anal sex. The toy will dilate your anal muscles, making it easier to enjoy painless penetration with a partner. 

Anal Beads

Anal beads are another great tool to improve the quality and enjoyment of anal stimulation. This popular sex toy consists of multiple beads attached together with a string.

The beads typically come in multiple sizes. You start from the smaller bead and work your way up to the bigger one, to stretch your anus gradually.

What makes these beads pleasurable is… removing them! After you’ve inserted all the spheres, including the larger one, remove them from the anus with a fast movement. It will be super pleasurable!

I strongly recommend removing the beads when you’re close to an orgasm, it’s a very intense sensation. Most anal beads have a flared base or finger loop for easy removal. 

Types of Sex Toys for Men

There are many pleasure accessories for guys as well! From hyper-realistic masturbators to prostate massagers, you’ll certainly find the right toy for your needs. Are you ready to discover a new realm of pleasure?

Realistic Male Masturbators aka Pocket Pussies

Just like the name suggests, these toys are fake vaginas you can play with. You’ll be surprised at how realistic they are! Modern materials, such as Cyberskin and TPE, feel just like real human skin.

Violet Myers Fleshlight Review

Violet Myers Fleshlight Review Best seller

❤️ Released on September 6th 2022, the Violet Myers Fleshlight is a widely anticipated sex toy among …
Add to wishlistAdded to wishlistRemoved from wishlist 1
Add to compare
Fleshlight Turbo Thrust Review

Fleshlight Turbo Thrust Review

The Fleshlight Turbo™ offers you the most realistic and satisfying alternative to oral sex. Uniquely designed …
Add to wishlistAdded to wishlistRemoved from wishlist 1
Add to compare

Fleshlight Quickshot Vantage Review

PLAY MORE. CLEAN LESS. Meet the QUICKSHOT™ Boost by Fleshlight®, our most compact sleeve to date. Lined with …
Add to wishlistAdded to wishlistRemoved from wishlist 4
Add to compare

These materials also warm up to the temperature of your body while you play, for an even more realistic sensation. I always recommend warming the fake vagina in your hands before playing. 

Always add plenty of water-based lube. Every time you wash your fake pussy, dry it well, then apply a generous coating of renewal powder. This helps the material to stay in tip top conditions!

Sex Dolls

What was once seen as a gimmick and joke with the old ‘inflatable sex dolls’ has now become a booming category with many realistic sex doll companies producing some amazing products. Now not only can you have a realistic pocket pussy, but you can have your very own sex doll who will cater to all your sexual desires.

Be prepared because you really do get what you pay for, and with many cheaper companies the quality of the realism is not very high. However, premium sex doll companies are ultra-realistic in features and in how they feel.

Non-realistic Male Masturbators

These toys are basically the same thing as realistic masturbators, but they don’t have the shape of a human vagina. They’re the right choice for guys who want an ultra-discreet toy or don’t feel like playing with a fake pussy.

Non-realistic masturbators can be non-vibrating or vibrating. The vibrating ones can have lots of fun features. For example, many models have a warming feature for extra simulation. Others provide an intense suction effect to replicate the sensations of a blowjob. 

These toys can be made from silicone, Cyberskin, or TPE.

Prostate Massagers

Prostate vibrators have a curved shape, which makes them look similar to women’s G-spot sex toys. The only difference is that prostate massagers have a flared base because they have to penetrate the anus. The flared base prevents the sex toy from going too deep inside, becoming too difficult to remove. 

The curved tip allows reaching the prostate easily and stimulate a man’s internal sweet spots. Many prostate massagers also have an external stimulator that massages the perineum, i.e., the area between the anus and the scrotum. 

Many of my male friends report getting mind-blowing orgasms from these devices, so don’t be ashamed and try one of them! You’ll thank me later!

If you don’t feel like using a vibrating device, look for a curved dildo or butt plug with a flared base. It will touch your prostate with every thrust, leading to intense sensations. You can even get a thrusting prostate massager to help create a more realistic pleasurable sensation.

Vibrating Penis Rings

Vibrating penis rings are not meant for solo use — they give their best when playing as a couple. He wears the ring at the base of his penis, then penetrates her in whatever position the couple wants. The vibrations will stimulate her clitoris, enhancing her pleasure.

At the same time, the ring applies a slight pressure on the base of the penis, making him last longer. It works, trust me!

In my experience, vibrating rings are a great tool to overcome a common issue in the bedroom — the orgasm gap. I’ve been many times in situations where my partner reached his orgasm very fast, but for me, penetration was not enough — I needed something extra in order to climax.

This created a lot of frustration. I found a simple vibrating ring pretty helpful — it delayed his orgasm and helped me to climax more fast. 

Non-vibrating Penis Rings

Non-vibrating rings are meant for use with a partner. They’re intended to make you last longer in the bedroom. They’re designed to fit snugly around the base of your penis for maximum effectiveness.

There are very discreet models out there, so you won’t have to worry if you don’t like wearing something too fancy during your sexual encounters. I have many friends who wear small, thin penis rings under their underwear or swimwear without a problem.

Why would they want to wear a penis ring under their clothes? Because the sex toy slightly restricts the blood flow, making the flaccid penis appear larger. 

What to Consider When Buying an Adult Toy 

Here are a few things you definitely want to consider when buying your first vibrator:

  • The price. Obviously, you’ll need to set a budget and try to stick to it. However, I think that paying more to get a high-quality toy is totally worth it. Silicone toys tend to cost more but the material is body-safe and provides an amazing sensation on the skin.
  • The battery life. Some toys have a rechargeable Li-ion battery. You’ll find a USB charger in the packaging. Others work with disposable batteries. Disposable batteries are typically not included in the packaging. You don’t want your vibrator to let you down in the middle of a hot play session. So, read carefully the info about battery life on the site you’re purchasing from. 
  • External or internal stimulation? Decide which type of stimulation you want and choose your toy accordingly.
  • Vaginal or anal penetration? If you prefer the latter, make sure to choose a toy with a flared base. This way, your new vibrator won’t get stuck into your anus.
  • Will you use the toy on your own or with a partner? The best toys to spice up your sexual encounters with a partner are remote-controlled love eggs and hands-free vibrators. 

How to Find the Right Size Vibrator

Finding the right size for your first internal vibrator may be tricky. I recommend sticking to a small size to start. This way, you can get used to the new sensation.

After you’ve played around with a small toy for a while, you’ll be able to move to a larger one without discomfort. 

Regardless of the toy size you choose, remember to use water-based lubes as they are the best lubes for sex toys

Which Sex Toy Material Should I Choose?

There are lots of materials that make up sex toys. These include silicone, PVC, borosilicate glass, stainless steel, and many more. 

This guide will help you choose the right sex toy material for your needs.

Make Sure That You Choose a Body-safe Material

Safety is of utmost importance when it comes to toys that go into contact with your most private parts. Most sex toys made by reputable manufacturers are body-safe and free from toxic substances.

However, some rubber and plastic materials may contain phthalates. Phthalates were commonly used in the past because they make the material softer and therefore more suitable for vaginal penetration. 

However, exposure to phthalates can damage your reproductive system and other parts of your body, including the liver, the kidneys, and the lungs. 

Your best bet is to stick to body-safe materials. Most of the time, silicone, borosilicate glass, stainless steel, and ABS plastic do not contain phthalates. So, you can use toys made from these materials without any worries. 

Pros and Cons of All Sex Toy Materials

Let me explain to you everything you need to know about the different sex toy materials. This way, choosing your first adult toy will be easier!


Today, silicone is the most common material used for rabbit vibrators, clitoral stimulators, and G-spot vibrators. It’s non-porous, which means that it can’t harbor bacteria.

Just wash your vibrator after each use with a specific toy cleaner and you’re done! No need to do anything else to ensure protection against the spread of STIs. If you want to share your toy with someone else, remember to wash it well between partners.

ABS Plastic

ABS plastic is another non-porous and body-safe material. Since it’s pretty rigid, this material is mostly used for bullet vibrators and external stimulators.

Most sex toys made from ABS plastic feature a polyurethane coating. This makes them softer and more pleasant to the touch. Don’t worry, polyurethane is a body-safe material. It’s the same material latex-free condoms are made from. 

Borosilicate Glass

Don’t worry, glass sex toys won’t break during use. They also won’t chip and scratch your intimate parts. They come in a special type of glass that is body-safe and specifically made to stimulate your pleasure spots.

For a little extra pleasure, keep your glass dildo in the freezer for a few minutes before use. The cool sensation will make your body even more receptive to sexual pleasure. Alternatively, you can warm up the toy in hot water.

Glass dildos are non-porous and you can clean them in the dishwasher! Just use a delicate cycle with no dish soap. 

Stainless Steel 

Stainless steel is another body-safe material. It’s commonly used for butt plugs and small dildos.

You can wash steel toys in the dishwasher and cool them in the freezer before use. This material gives incredible sensations inside the anus because it’s heavy and super smooth. 

Stainless steel is hygienic and non-porous. 


These materials are super soft and they can warm up to the temperature of your body for a realistic feel. Most masturbation sleeves and jelly-like vibrators for internal stimulation are made from these materials. 

These materials are bendable to fit the curves of your body. That’s why beginners tend to like them. Since these materials are porous, I always suggest using toys made from them with a condom, for better hygiene. 

That’s all you need to know before buying your first toy. Whether you choose a vibrator for couples or a non-vibrating toy, you’ll certainly get a satisfying experience. 

Kimberly Wade
Kimberly Wade

Hi, I'm Kimberly Wade, your go-to wellness advocate and professional sex toy tester. I work at Sexsi Toys, where I've had the opportunity to test hundreds of pleasure products. I'm a huge advocate for sexual well-being, and my job allows me to merge that passion with hands-on experience. I'm dedicated to ensuring that every product meets my high standards for functionality, safety, and sexual pleasure. So if you're looking for expert advice about sex toys, I'm your girl.

We will be happy to hear your thoughts

Leave a reply

Sexsi Toys Logo White

Sexsi Toys Brands

Brands owned & operated by Sexsi Toys

Sensual Sync Logo
Sex Toys NZ

© 2023 Sexsi Toys

We may earn commission from links on this page, but we only recommend products we back.

Sexsi Toys
Compare items
  • Total (0)